Too fast

Tomorrow starts a whole new school year.

I'm hopeful this one will be less of a disaster than the last year. Last year was rough. I spent the bulk of the year trial and error-ing Aj's medications and therapies, wading through social/bullying issues with Gavin and holding the hand of Syd's student-teacher-substitute turned full-time teacher after her regular teacher quit.

Fact is, i was excited about this summer. I thought we'd have a lot more fun but we spent a lot of time helping Aj adjust, dealing with a ridiculous lack of impulse control, helping Gavin with pre-teen hormones and watching my sweet baby girl turn into a sassy and independent school girl.

And we were busy. We tried to keep to a strict schedule which made the hours, minutes and days drag on but the weeks and months fly by. As July came to a fast close and August reared it's ugly head, I started counting the days until we could all get a little space.

It wasn't just me. The kids were feeling it, too. They love school, learning and their friends. I love watching them learn and grow and be successful. I love helping them with their schoolwork and listen to all the joys and struggles of their days. It can be gut-wrenching to listen to them try to learn to manuever life but it gives me great pride when they do it well.

But tomorrow starts a whole new school year and I am letting them go a little more hesitantly than I thought I would. I will let them go and be oh-so-grateful when they come home and I can hold them in my arms. I will tell them I'm so glad they are mine and I will make time for them, first and foremost. i will prioritize a little more carefully because time is precious and it goes by too fast. My time with my family, my children, my husband is precious and it's finite on this earth.

I lost my nephew, Collin, a little over a week ago... my oldest brother and his wife would give anything to have with him what I have with all 3 of my children... Time to cuddle, to play, to laugh, to love, to talk, to touch... to be together.

This summer went by a litle too fast for me. i wish i could rewind and enjoy them just a little more than I did.

Collin taught me that there is always something to smile about. He has also reminded me something that I've known too well but have forgotten as of late... life is short. Make time for the things that are most important - you never know when time will run out. It goes too fast and you can't get it back.